As we were tucking the Littles into bed tonight, Hotter farted.*
"Oh Jesus Christ," I exclaimed, fanning the air while the boys rolled around laughing in their beds with their pillows over their faces.
"It was Little Child," Hotter insisted.
"HIS BODY ISN'T EVEN LARGE ENOUGH TO CONTAIN SUCH FOULNESS," I gasped.
"We're practically the same size," Hotter argued. I lifted him.** "Eh, it's just about true."
Middle Child pondered for a moment, then asked "Hotter? Do you not weigh ath much because you're mith-ing organth?"
I explained that Hotter actually has MORE organs than the average person, since they left the old ones in.
And then I suggested that perhaps he's lightweight because he's full of gas.
I love Middly's logic, though!
* It bears mentioning that this was no ordinary fart. Hotter's chronic GI troubles cause, among other unpleasant things, frequent, loud, FECKING AWFUL flatulence. Or as I put it the other day, when children and their little ears were not present, DEAR GOD THAT SMELLED LIKE SOMEONE LIT A GANGRENOUS LIMB ON FIRE AND TRIED TO PUT IT OUT BY TAKING A HANGOVER SHIT ON IT.
** Yeah, he's lost a lot of weight as a result of said GI problems' recent flare-up. Plus I'm freakishly strong, but mostly the first one. And yes, he has seen a doctor (and a specialist) about this, and they have tried various treatments, but not much helps. The prevailing theory is that between his being diabetic for twenty-some years and vessels that fed his intestines being diverted to sustain the donor organs his guts are underoxygenated and/or have nerve damage, or something like that, although it's sometimes better and sometimes worse, but there just aren't enough people with Hotter's constellation of medical issues walking around for anyone to form more than an educated guess.