This morning I finally got to see MY doctor, who diagnosed me with bronchitis, sinusitus, an ear infection, pneumonia and too much STRESS. I am not allowed to go back to work or be outside until the 21st at the earliest. Ugh. Mystery Hand is a burst blood vessel because my connective tissue sucks and my pansy-ass cardiovascular system can't handle the strain of trying to breathe coupled with the stress of whatever ails Hotter, and Trashcan Neighbor and the landlady's bullshit, and if it happens somewhere more important than my pinky knuckle that could be really bad. So I have a long list of criteria for returning to the ER about either Mystery Hand, my breathing, or any additional burst vessels and am under orders to lay low, take more antibiotics and steroids plus a lot of codeine and demerol (my doctor was like "burst blood vessels HURT and it MUST hurt you to breathe, let me give you something that's not mixed with Tylenol so you can take as much as you need within reason," because she is compassionate and not a moron), and stay somewhere else if Hotter's brain is broken and/or he can't be nice because the stress is absolutely making things worse and my blood pressure is fine but she is still worried I am at risk for a hemmorhagic stroke until I shake these bugs and can get off the steroids and address my stress levels.
Regarding Dr. Shithead, I have filed a complaint with the freestanding ER's business office, the charge nurse, and the medical director, and they were all appalled and apologetic. They agreed that I should not have to pay for my mistreatment at their facility's hands via Dr. Shithead yesterday, and I stressed that I was not trying to sue or get out of paying for the steroid IV and antihistamines, since those were helpful and appropriate, but am just not willing to pay for the blood and urine specimen collections since nobody used those for anything, or any kind of physician's fee, because obviously. The medical director tried to come at me with "we send the police to check on people who leave with IVs in," but I shut him down and said I left the IV on the gurney so that they could see it was out, and told them when they called me to ask about it where they could find it and that I was on my way to another medical facility to get some treatment and have them check the IV site, so no, that was NOT a reasonable thing to do, either Dr. Shithead was just being a jerk or he was trying to cover his ass in case I'd listened to him and taken Ibuprofen and started bleeding. Either way, NOT COOL.
I don't think I will be getting a bill.
Regarding Trashcan Neighbor, she has clean lost her mind and is harassing EVERYONE in the neighborhood, not just us. Three neighboring households are going to call MFA Landlord and assure him that it's not us, it's HER, and there is actually a class action suit against her in the works (HA!), plus one neighbor has posted huge NO TRESPASSING SIGNS and threatened Trashcan Neighbor to her face that she will shoot her on sight if she steps foot on their land, so it's like THAT. It's good to know this isn't specific to us, but good lord, that woman needs to get fucked or drop dead or be put in a retirement home with BARS.
As far as Hotter...I told him he is giving me flashbacks to my first marriage what with the doctor telling me to physically get away from my spouse for my own mental and physical wellbeing and ought to be ashamed of himself for that and for having stopped contributing in any way to the household's upkeep and my non-unhappiness. He sees his neurologist on the 29th, and I will be off steroids and present for that to see what goes down. If there is no brain tumor or medical reason why he is behaving so poorly he can either request psych and talk therapy referrals for anger management and proceed to aggressively unfuck himself, or I will leave him at the damn hospital with train fare to his mother's house and go home and change the locks. If there IS a brain tumor or medical reason for his behavior, a neurological condition would only EXPLAIN, not EXCUSE. The question is does he have the capacity to act right, with help. If not then I'm sorry, not living like that. If so, great, get on it and if he can turn it around I will forgive him because I took vows, but if he won't put in the effort then same story, so sorry, so DONE. The only reason he is not already out on his ass is that this MAY be beyond his control, which would require a more compassionate transition out of my house than if he is just a jerk. I am not cold enough to leave an intellectually impaired man without the ability to make good, safe choices at the train station. But if he's just a jerk and plans to stay in this bitter, angry rut then all aboard, toot toot!
I kind of don't even know whether I am hoping to hear that there is Something Wrong With Hotter or that there is no neurological explanation and this is a mood disorder/personality issue. Neither one would be easy to fix, and while I will do my best to forgive him if he starts TRYING to be better I don't know that I'll ever really trust him again. I've always gotten over his outbursts and episodes in the past, but yesterday and today were new lows. To his credit, I think (I hope) he may have finally HEARD me when I said I cannot and will not keep doing this, and I think he is ashamed enough by what my doctor said today to simmer the hell down (I did not take him with me--he offered to come and I said no thank you because I wasn't actively dying like I was yesterday before the ER and therefore did not need moral support or next of kin or want to expose him to the waiting room germs, plus I leveled with him and said I was going to have to tell my doctor I was having some anxiety and depression issues as a result of his health and behavior and didn't want to do it in front of him and be interrupted or contradicted since my doctor's appointment was about MY health and feelings, not his).
As to how I am...I think I am the sickest I have ever been outside of a hospital, my face, ear, throat, chest, and hand are killing me despite major drugs, I'm sad and mad and fed up with life, and I cannot WAIT to get back to work. I have had more than enough quantity time with Hotter, and would like to talk to pleasant people and make some money.
And how are all of YOU?