Well, today at long last the AC guy came, again, and seems to have fixed things. It's a luxurious 76 degrees in the house! Of course, Mrs. Landlord also poked around the house giving things the white glove test, and gave Hotter a ration of shit (I was at work) about how we needed to pull this weed in the yard and dust this surface and "I no understand how you live like this, grass need cutting!" Hotter finally said THE SAME WAY WE LIVE WITH NO TOILET FOR THREE WEEKS AND BROKEN AC FOR THE WHOLE SUMMER AND A CAVED-IN KITCHEN FLOOR AND A BREAKER PANEL THAT SHOCKS YOU IF YOU FUCKING TOUCH IT. YOU ARE HERE TO PAY THE AC REPAIRMAN, NOT TELL ME HOW TO LIVE MY LIFE!
Evidently she had nothing else to say after that.
I am at a bit of a loss. One day (two days ago) this nutbar is telling me how she hopes we can be like family to each other (and actually between the rapid personality changes, hypocrisy, narcissism, gaslighting, and attempted assault, she and Mr. Landlord are doing a damn good job of acting like the biological family I was legally emancipated from at sixteen for VERY GOOD REASONS), and two days later she's giving Hotter the business to the point that he snaps on her (and if he is not in the midst of a psychomotor/temporal lobe seizure Hotter is the kindest, most easygoing person you will ever meet). I have 100% confidence in his reporting of events, because Mrs. Landlord has made similar remarks to me regarding scrubbing the kitchen floor, at a time when she was here with a contractor looking to replace said floor the next day, hence my saying "fuck it" and not scrubbing it (and then she pretended the floor was fine for three months until it caved in, and currently we have plywood down in the kitchen so that we can walk across it and use the sink and stove).
I'm half-hoping, honestly, that Mrs. Landlord will forget all about the floor for another little while, because I can live with the plywood more easily than I can live with any further encounters with those people any time soon. She said something to both Hotter and me the other day about wanting to get together for coffee once all of our children are back in school and talk about how to be like family to each other, which I have a feeling would involve our being willing to tolerate endless repair delays cheerfully and without deducting anything from the rent even if the house in uninhabitable. My plan is to reply via e-mail if she brings it up again with something along the lines of "we will get along just GREAT as long as you obey the law and honor the lease, and we will continue to do the same, so there is nothing to discuss, thanks. I talk to my one living relative I didn't give birth to fewer than six times per year, and usually he doesn't know who I am, so if you would like to forget my number and cut waaaaaay back on the interaction we can do that, sure. GOOD TALK!"
Okay, maybe I'll leave out the last two sentences, but man am I ever tempted.