I...am not my most amazing self at the moment. I'm still coughing up a lung, my back still hurts, and I'm still freaking out about not having a safety net and OMG THE FUCKING HOLIDAYS and whatnot. Plus there's the prednisone, which does not improve matters. I basically want to eat ALL THE THINGS while crying and wielding a meat cleaver against the deserving, and then when my cleaving arm wears out, start a million innernet flamewars. The other night we thought the possum had returned, and I grabbed my trusty hand-hoe and charged out to Squatter Workshop ready to dispatch the motherfucker*, but there was no possum after all and I was...a little disappointed, actually. Because apparently part of me was looking forward to doing battle? Instead I had to content myself with going OFF on the XY via text message (he did deserve it, at least, but usually I refrain...still, I needed to feed SOMEone to my lions and thought the ex-husband was a better candidate than the current one).
So...yeah. Imma sit down and shut up until I've, uh, processed my current feelings (and stepped down on the steroids).
* If any of y'all want to hate on me for this, keep in mind that a) possums kill chickens and bunnies and b) you're not going to change my mind. I fucking hate possums whether I'm on steroids or not. It's true. There is just NO EXCUSE FOR THEM. Did you know they have more teeth than any other land animal? THEY EVEN HAVE TEETH UNDER THEIR TONGUES. And this is not your cue to bombard me with photos of their babies, either, because THEY STILL HAVE THAT FUCKING TAIL AND THAT ASININE POINTY FACE and THEY GROW UP TO BE BIG POSSUMS. If you have pet-possum stories to share, then you are a sick person. Possums are not pet material. A possum tried to eat my pregnant dog when I was eleven and I had to bludgeon it to death with the stock of a jammed BB gun to get it to turn loose. NOT OKAY! The dog ended up being fine, and so did the possum, apparently, as when I went back outside to dispose of the body there was none. FURTHER EVIDENCE THAT POSSUMS ARE FUCKING EVIL. Down with possums!