MFA Mama: *Gets up early on day off to go run an errand that is only necessary due to Hotter's three-year procrastination on a matter that took five minutes online to resolve from home.*
Hotter: *snores blissfully*
MFA Mama: *Encounters administrative glitch that means paperwork with Hotter's signature is needed to complete errand in time to avoid negative consequences, grumbles, goes home and asks Hotter to get up and help find said paperwork.*
Hotter: *feels need to point out that if there IS a negative consequence as a result of his procrastination, he wouldn't be the only one in the house to have incurred one as a result of same, begins listing MFA Mama's past transgressions in an area where she has since taken his wishes into account and made changes to suit his preferences*
MFA Mama: *ignores Hotter in favor of finding and completing paperwork*
Hotter: *pounds on table with his fist like asshole*
MFA Mama: *presents paperwork for Hotter's signature*
Hotter: *says MFA Mama can go ahead and sign it for him, implying it was unnecessary to wake him for this*
MFA Mama: *declines to forge anyone's signature on financial documents, takes signed paperwork to complete errand, comes home and fires up Typepad*
I don't know what to do with this one, y'all. The issue of this particular bout of procrastination on Hotter's part has become a major one in the MFA Marriage, and it's stupid as all hell. Hotter is 100% in the wrong on this one but has somehow decided that my voicing any hint of displeasure about the three to four errands per month this issue has caused me to have to run for the past three years is verboten and worthy of instant ire on his part. After this month the whole thing should be over and done with and no longer an issue, but Hotter's response to any real or imagined criticism from me is to trot out the same past issues, and I have already done absolutely everything possible to accommodate his preferences there.
I've speculated before that my second marriage is a tool that the universe is using to help me better understand the issues in my first one (aside from the things the XY did that were outside the bounds of common decency--yes, he did some stuff that was beyond the pale and made the divorce absolutely mandatory, but in addition to that there were still the typical interpersonal squabbles and grudges of any decade-long relationship). I certainly was guilty of holding past issues against my first husband and trotting them out any time we quarrelled, and now I can see where he was coming from with the "what more do you want" because yeah, it sucks to be on the other end of that one. In the case of my first marriage I just shouldn't have taken the XY back after he cheated, because I should have been self-aware enough to realize that his cheating on me while I was living in the hospital with a critically-ill newborn wasn't something I would ever be able to let go of. Live and learn. The issue Hotter has a problem with is a MUCH lesser offense (no infidelity involved, but rather something that is a matter of personal opinion), but maybe it is nevertheless one he's never going to be able to move past? In any case there was absolutely no reason for today to become A Bad Day, but it has, and now we are going to have to Have A Talk.
Wish me luck.
ETA: We talked, and Hotter says he's going to Drop It. In my heart of hearts I am skeptical that I've heard the last of the issue, but if I continue to belabor it then I'm the asshole at this point. Hotter had a valid question when he asked me what more I wanted besides his assurance that he will, in fact, let it go. Realistically there's nothing he can do short of going back in time and dropping it sooner or speeding time up and demonstrating his ability to let this one die. GET ON THAT WHOLE TIME-TRAVEL THING, HOTTER, GAWWWWD :)