You know how when you were a kid and you'd break your arm for like, the fifth or sixth time and be crying about it, and your dad would offer to smash one of your toes with a hammer to take your mind off it and laugh like it was as funny as the first time he'd made you that offer, except that only he had found it funny then, and probably because he was high? No? Just me?
Aaaaanyway, my back is feeling much better, or maybe it just SEEMS that way because my foot is really sore and suddenly deformed.
Figure One: Yes, I photo-edited my foot. I've never photo-edited my FACE, but then I don't have my father's face and I have his feet EXACTLY. I originally posted this photo on the Facespace, unedited, from The Precious, and then one of my friends pointed out how unfortunate-looking my feet are, because my friends are dicks. Dicks who all seem to think I have gout. Then I opened up the photo from my laptop and wanted to die.
I seriously doubt it's gout (heh). Because I eat almost none of the things on the "stuff to avoid" list for gout, and the ones I do eat I eat rarely and in small amounts. Also, I get plenty of Vitamin C (I take it daily as studies have shown that doing so may help prevent degenerative changes in my type of connective tissue disease). But I suppose it's possible, as I'm a lifelong outlier. If it's not gout I think it's most likely a bunion, which wouldn't make a ton of sense either (I don't wear heels and while I have loose joints and a job that requires me to be constantly on my feet, that's not a new thing), but who the hell knows.
In other news, my new work pants arrived today (arrived because I buy all of my clothes second-hand from eBay). I've been wearing the last pair of Dickies I bought for work at the Hotel California all this time, even though they were already too big when I got the job at The Ritz, because money. They were size 12s, and I remember being super-happy when I bought them, because that was a size down. My new pair are 8s. They're too big. The good news is, they're only a size or two too big, so I'll still look way less ridiculous than I have in recent weeks (it actually wasn't THAT bad, since I wear a bistro-length apron as part of my work uniform--I gathered the "pleats" at the front, secured them with a belt, and tied my apron over the whole shebang--STEALTHY). So I'm looking forward to being considerably less lumpy about the waist tomorrow at work.
And finally: you know you've worked too many days straight when you get to your car after a shift and go to unlock it by swiping your Micros card down the crack of the door (I didn't actually stick it in--I said stick it in--but I did go so far as to hold it out toward the Beater and stare blankly, and that's bad enough).
That's all the news from here. How are all of YOU?