8:30 a.m. Eastern Time
Anonymous Friend: I HATE EVERYTHING!
How are YOU?
MFA Mama: I hate quite a bit. Let's bitch.
AF: My SO has been traveling for a week and I have five animals to care for.
MFA Mama: *wince*
AF: I am not an animal person.
MFA Mama: Bahaha.
AF: They're all kind of wacky and demanding animals, too.
MFA Mama: I dislike animals currently as well.
AF: That is really what I hate the most followed closely by my insomnia.
MFA Mama: Word.
AF: You have a lot more animals to hate, I would imagine.
MFA Mama: Seventeen rabbits, four chickens, two dogs, a cockatiel, a bearded dragon, and two betta-fish, currently.
And ALL of them assholes!
AF: I'm not even sure I know what a bearded dragon IS!
MFA Mama: It's a great stonking lizard. The object of my youngest's affections and the acquisition of his gross little dreams.
Also: an asshole.
It rips its lizard-hammock (Godiva help me that I even know what that IS, much less own one) down daily, tears the bark off its shade-log, requires daily chopped salads from a proscribed list of veggies and twice-weekly live crickets...
For the record, having parrots is much the same.
MFA Mama: It takes big bird-like shits and can JUMP.
AF: They scream, they yell, they require frequent water changes because they have delicate immune systems, blah blah blah...
MFA Mama: Oh, and if it's constipated you have to run it a warm bath and let it crap in your tub, then bleach the tub, burn the house down, and move because they carry salmonella.
AF: WHAT OH MY GOD WHY DO PEOPLE KEEP THOSE AS A PET?
MFA Mama: They're charming creatures. Want one?
AF: I do not need any more pets in our tiny abode!
MFA Mama: Clementine's alright, I guess, just needy like every other damn thing alive in these parts.
AF: I share a really small space with these birds.
MFA Mama: The lactating rabbits are thirsty, the chickens smell and also need water, the hound whines early for having to pee, an hour before the middle-school bus because DST, at the correct time too because YAY WHINE, at mealtimes...
the pitbull is a bedhog
The cockatiel's treats are recalled and need to be returned to the store; they're mocking me in their bag. Actually, I think they were contaminated (or possibly contaminated) with salmonella, haaaa!
The 10,000 or so (currently) bees will soon require an expensive thingamajig in which to make honey...
I'm going to try to go back to sleep...I have A Thing in three hours, and the birds will need water changes, and UGH.
MFA Mama: Good luck with that. The hound woke me at six, we have a lunch-date, and then later I'm getting stabbed in the arm with a needle for an hour by a big scary dude for fun. I think maybe I am doing Days Off wrong?
AF: Yes, I am doing weekends similarly.