* The MFA Minivan is home from the mechanic. Now her instrument panel doesn't light up until she's been running for five minutes (remember when I had that rebuilt for a million dollars last year?) but at least the radiator job cost thirty-five bucks more than I thought it would!
* Still, you will notice that I have not given up utterly on the Ladies Social Media Convention and still have my party badges up, because damn, if you had all of that on your dance-card would you let it go gently? Plus, my roommate keeps telling me I need to trust the universe more. She's a California hippy and shit; I'll be like "we're both really broke, why the hell are we even buying tickets to this thing and sitting here drinking Starbucks and making plans when our water and power are probably cut off RIGHT THIS MOMENT?" and she'll go all "see, I'm a hippy, I trust the universe and it all works out, you need to TRUST THE UNIVERSE, MFA MAMA" and when MFA Mechanic (who has become a friend, I won't lie; his wife has twin boys on the spectrum and we talk about our woes and I even shared my oral sex analogy with him and he laughed and said I was exactly right) asked me what I was going to do about all this (because he knows how grim things are and cringes when he gives me the bad news) I said that my spirit animal was a chubby-hot girl with devil-horns and she was suggesting that I trust the universe, and I was going to give it a try. So yeah, my mechanic thinks I'm nuts now but he'll live.
* I'm even having a contest! One of you here in the next day or few will become this blog's THREE HUNDREDTH COMMENTER and I will happily give you a Marx Fine Foods in Bulk (Wholesale Online) discount code for a fifth off your order from them, plus a little in fact which is a funny story: Justin Marx had this kickass idea and issued 20.09% discount codes for bloggers that he included in this sample "the first hit is free" package to bloggers who wanted in on it (packages of things like delicious gourmet sugars, salts, and dried chilis, which are pretty much better than drugs at Casa MFA). When I wrote to them in late 2009 that discount was No Longer Available (because in 2010 20.09% is just a funny-looking discount and they were thinking ahead) but I told Justin how I would be the PERFECT BLOGGER to review their stuff because I COOK LIKE A MOFO and I was MARRYING A CHEF and do you know how totally awesome Justin was? He sent me samples of EVERYTHING as a wedding present, and he even threw in some VANILLA BEANS because I mentioned how awesome they were and how I'd found his website searching for them online--two kinds, y'all, including the ones I used in Big Child's belated birthday cupcakes here and in this rice pudding and the infamous French Toast!!! In fact, that chili I made for our wedding guests? Those were Marx Foods ancho chilies in it. So they rock a lot and I use and love their products and they are also all about word-of-mouth in the online foodie community (see what I did with that? That is eight years of upper-level study of Creative Writing in action right there, and Justin is going "and why did I throw in the extra vanilla beans aside from I'm so damn nice? I could have written that myself" or really he's too nice to think such a thing, but sadly for him I'm the writer here and I'm telling it my way) and gave me this vintage discount code to pass along to one of you lovely people and it was like "whoo! Exclusive!" and then it was like "whoa, bad things!" and time went by and now I just look like more of a spazz than usual because 2009 was so six months ago but anyway I told y'all Hotter lost my Ritalin prescription so this is what you get until August. Way to go, Hotter.
* Justin Marx is probably out truffle-hunting with a virginal pig by the light of a waxing Pacific Northwest crescent moon or some-such shaking his fist at Hotter for that right now via satellite because this is the lamest blog-giveaway he's ever seen. Sorry about him, Justin, but if you had him making you dinner you'd forgive him for losing your methamphetamine prescription too. SO! To summarize, Justin Marx is too nice for his own good, but he runs a kickass company selling products I can personally vouch for and the three-hundredth commenter wins the discount code, and once you've looked at the Marx Foods website you will want that thing.
* If this was the movie version of my life some big fancy travel company would be all "and that is exactly the kind of review we want her to write for US!" and hook me and mom up with tickets to and from BlogHer '10, but if this was the movie version of my life then let's face it Hotter would be as brilliant outside of the kitchen and the bedroom as he is in them and I would have enough Ritalin to write well enough for that to happen AND probably I'd be played by Cameron Diaz. But instead Justin is wondering what he'd have to send me to never mention his company again and mom and I are trusting the universe to get us to NYC in August and Hotter is probably not putting out tonight, not that I'd give HIM any anyway, since this is pretty much his fault to begin with.
Disclaimers: I did receive free sample products to review from Marx Foods, and accept from them a discount code to give away to a lucky reader, but they did not compensate me in any way for writing this review itself and no one except for me had any authority over editorial content. The words and ideas I have used here do not reflect the views of Marx Foods.
That Justin, what a star.
I'll just nip off and give the UNiverse a quick pep-talk and general scolding on your behalf, shall I (nice cop, nasty cop in one go. Lucky Universe). I don't want you to miss the Ladies Social Media Convention either. Apart from anything else, I'd love to hear (well, read) your take on it.
Posted by: May | June 8, 2010 at 02:39 AM